Parenting: Single Mom Surviving Guide
For the first time in the almost 7 years that I have been a mother, I am not working. I have worked 2 jobs almost the entire time, and now that I am out of work, I have no idea what to do. I have 2 daughters that I am home with daily who have always been with family or a sitter while I work. I will admit the first week was nice, being home, playing and enjoying them.
But after the novelty wore off, I find myself thinking how are we going to occupy our time? Everything is shut down, and I will not risk bringing them out in public and compromising their health in any way. I also have to worry about my oldest and her schooling. I have found it’s the little things getting us by.
I am not a teacher, and trying to keep things going with a child who needs a little more help academically has been challenging yet rewarding. Her teachers have been phenomenal sending me information and ideas for activities.
You can’t convince a 6-year-old to sit and learn when her 4-year-old sister is running around. I have tried to turn everything into a learning game. We spend as much time as possible outside. Walks are huge for us, rain or shine, we bundle up and go out. We count cars, we play I spy so they look for certain colors. We normally read at night, and now she is reading to me and her sister at night. I don’t know if I am helping her or if she is learning but I know I am trying.
Keeping a schedule is super important. I did not do that the first week and I had a pack of wild wolves running the house. They got up super early, passed out in the early evening for a nap and then wanted to be up all night. So I went back and kept their bedtime and wake up time the same. Routine seems to be very important for them.
More Pareting: Your Child Is Not Your Friend
I also try to keep electronic time to the same it has been. I know there are days that they are on them a little more because I have them using educational apps to keep some sort of learning occurring. But allowing them to watch television all day means the energy they have when I try to put them to bed is like trying to catch a chicken.
It’s the simple things like playing soccer in the back yard that seems to be making a huge impact. Puzzles, coloring and hair salon are a few other activities that seem to help. I am always looking for new activities and ideas. But it is not just them that I need to worry about through all of this. I know I need to take care of myself.
Alone time seems to be minimal and you can only listen to the same story, or watch the same children’s movie so many times before you crave more. There is a lack of adult interaction that, I as an adult seem to be missing. My time and attention is on my girls. They both fight for me, so my texts go unread for hours even days.
Explaining to people that I am taking this time to be with my kids is frustrating as people don’t seem to understand. I have friends and family who get mad at me. I won’t apologize as a single mother, they will not be this little again. I want them to look back on this and say that mom played soccer with me, not played on her phone. The only thing I can hope is compassion and understanding.
There is no right or wrong way to handle this, most of us are in new territory. I find myself just trying to make the kids have a smile on their face. It usually includes popcorn and the same movie every single night. If you see me singing Disney songs after this, I apologize in advance.
